is this…?

(started on 23rd June 2009. And I somehow stalled. So this is the completed version. Finally.)

i steal too many moments to be with you;

often compromise myself to stay in sync.

good girls like bad boys, so the adage goes

(but who is the one who does all this naming?

those on the outside pressing their noses in,

delving into business that is not their own).

so anyway, this is my lament to you:

for you to make up your mind about me now -

where i stand, should i stay – am i crazy to?

Your call: speak now, or forever hold your peace.

okay. stop press. I’m back.

and after that nice narcissistic intro: hello everyone.

I’ve been busy.

PLAY

I’ve also been away: went to London and Portugal about ago… we were going tp Lisbon ‘cos dad had a meeting there and the family decided to tag along. London was nice and cool – we just wandered around with no set plan in mind. Ended up looking (and drooling) at Aston Martins (dad was actually tasked by his friend to help buy one – and he did!), looking at nice apartments. We walked a lot – at one point walking around 5 kms before we got to a nice dim sum lunch at Royal China! We stayed at the Metropolitan, in Park Lane. Besides the shopping, we also caught the musical La Cage aux Folles (remember the movie ‘The Birdcage’? It was adapted from this play).

So then it was off to Lisbon. The hotel we stayed in was a rather lacklustre (read: lousy) introduction to Lisbon; Hotel Villa Galle Opera made Holiday Inn look luxurious. It was next to the railways station, and the room they gave us was right next to the river (which sounds really nice, and you would expect a good view) but the noise was incredible. our parents’ got the room where most of the noise was sealed off from a properly fitting window, but ours was a different story. Thank god Dad managed to get our rooms changed. [i shall reserve my opinion on the Portuguese govt, that they put all the honorary consuls in this place!]

Lisbon is not an easy plase to get around in by foot; it’s as if they enthusiastically put up signs everywhere and then while you are on your way to the tourist spot, you don’t see anything else! (and then when you finally DO get there, the signs are there, telling u, hey u’re here. what’s the point, already?). We ended up getting pretty lost for a bit; we took the famous Tram 28 (which trundles through the old bit of Lisbon, Alfama) to see Castle Sao Jorge, but somehow manage to miss it (the inability to let tourists know where we are supposed to be going seems to be quite prevalent!), and ended up at the Santa Maria Maior de Lisboa, the Lisbon Cathedral, by mistake. It’s a beautiful old church, and the sacristy holds the relics of St Vincent (the patron saint of Lisbon), icons and other religious art. So we took the tram all the way back down again. and then a cab from the city back to our hotel.

the next day: the town of Belem. it has a patisserie there dating back to the 1800s that is famous for the egg tarts – and since there were throngs of tourists outside, we didn’t manage to eat any [well at least not from that particular shop, anyhow. but we got some at the airport shop, which we ate on the trip back to london for our connecting flight. yummers.] we saw the Jeronimos Monastery, which really is quite a beautiful old building; the insid of the church was breathtaking, the high arch ceilings, the stained glass… Then we tried to walk to Bairro Alto, which is supposed to be quite ‘happening’ at night(but we were going in the day) and as usual, the (lack of signs) threw us of completely; we walked for ages, never found it, and instead ended up walking past/around all the places that we meant to get to!

The 3rd day we caved in and booked a tour on a bus that would take us to Sintra (playground of royalty in the good old days; we stopped at Palacio da Pena), Cabo da Roca (westernmost point on continental Europe), Cascais (former summer residence of the royal family) and Estoril.

We also had dinner on two nights with my dad’s friends; the food is generally okay (not great), seafood, but their company was extremely pleasant. We also ventured out on our own to eat on a couple of nights when dad was not available [he was there to work after all], and we did pretty good.

I should just let the pictures tell the rest of the story: and here they are: http://s17.photobucket.com/albums/b97/GenieGrrl/Portugal%202009/.

WORK

It’s been insane at work…. and the insanity has only just ended. Been trying to do 5000 things at once, until I get to the point where I have to stop remind myself to BREATHE. Handling 4 different publications at once and it is getting to be a nightmare. Have thought many many times of throwing in the towel, and have actually attempted to do so. it got so bad that i broke down twice at work (and i am not proud of that), as there were other politics involved [with another colleague who was convinced that the work she was assigned (my stuff) included some stuff that I was too lazy t take in earlier, and hence she now has to make up for it] too, But the sup. has dissuaded me; they try to convince me that I truly do have a place here, that I am good, that I was made for this, that there is a career progression here. and that i should really stay. [eh if u need me just say so la. ] but really. sometimes there is a limit. i guess i really have to wait until the emotions stop boiling over and/if i get another good position and then see how things go. sigh.

Alright i am going to end here, otherwise this post will remain as a draft for a bit longer…

the fear mongering won out.

sigh. was hoping that open-mindedness and sensibility would win out, but it was not to be so. so the CSE is now going to be reviewed, and the programmes by external vendors to be reviewed. and AWARE’s programme in particular, was singled out.

Again i make no claim to knowing what is in the guide – I have not seen it. But speaking most generally, I think information is power, and all available information should be out there for all to know. the “ignorance is bliss” stance is not my thing; neither is taking a ‘moral’ stance on something that, quite frankly, unless u are a geneticist (because of the lack of solid evidence), u are not qualified to do. we don’t know how sexuality and one’s sexual preference is determined; just because there has yet to be proof of the influence of genetics does not automatically mean that it is therefore a ‘lifestyle choice’.

That aside, I was very glad to to see in the papers today, two letters slamming TSM’s view that anyone who was vocal and opposed to her thinking was ’sexually challenged’: they, as did I, found that incredibly offensive. (on another note, my ‘I’m on page 73′ t-shirt has just arrived it’s a nice fit, too.)

P.S.: I seem to have found my ‘activist’ streak: also attended the Pink Dot event… and I am in the pix!!!
(http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=30212930&id=1166152950. ) Honestly, I never saw so much pink in one place; and TSM would have a fit and then some, seeing so many beautiful (but not to her) people  of the LGBT community out and about. We should have just dropped her in the midst…

P.P.S: Attended the “Action for AIDS” memorial too. Personally, I think they should do away with the performances; it makes everything seem contrived and detract from the actual gravity of the topic at hand. Notably, the Christian part of the prayers offered stressed that AIDS cut across all classes and boundaries, and makes no distinction, and affects “all people regardless of sexuality”. Another notable absence: no Muslim religious leader was there. Hmm.