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This is going to be a thank you note. yet at the same time it’s going to sound like i am ungrateful. let me get it straight that i really appreciate the intentions and the good thoughts of those people who have been reading my blog, and feel sympathy/empathy for what I am going through . but i need to deal with this in my own way, and while I appreciate some of the thoughts, it’s just enough for me to know that you care. that’s all. and i know it sounds picky of me to tell people how they should be sympathetic. but i think sometimes a simple ” i am thinking of you” is enough.
so, in my long, convoluted way: THANK YOU. 
When your heart is wrenched from the inside out
When you have drowned in the river that you have cried
When the physical ache makes you ill
When a song on the radio makes you want to scream
When all the melodramatics settle in
When everything becomes a reminder
And there is nothing that you can do about it.
See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you
Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you
With or without you
With or without you
Through the storm we reach the shore
You give it all but I want more
And I’m waiting for you
With or without you
With or without you
I can’t live
With or without you
And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away
My hands are tied
My body bruised, she’s got me with
Nothing to win and
Nothing left to lose And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself awayWith or without you
With or without you
I can’t live
With or without you
With or without you
With or without you
I can’t live
With or without you
With or without you
- U2, “With or Without You”, from the album The Joshua Tree (1987)
